Just when I feel as I have failed, in many ways more than one, I see you. The beauty I made. I see my son, my daughters, my heart. I made those eyes, I made those lips, I made every hair on your little body. I stay home and care for you, and watch you as you grow. I created you, crafted you, carried you in the depths of my body, and soon after, in my arms. You look just like me in ways. You fed from my body, inside and out. I want to cry and give up, and then I look at you sleeping, so soundless, and motionless, but your heart beats, the heart I morphed. I see your eyes moving behind your eyelids and I wonder what you’re dreaming of, what your little brain is showing you, there’s a fire lit in your head that I was able to start. You speak to me, you find comfort in me, you ache for me, to hold you and love you. I made those emotions, I taught you those words and motions. I see your milestones and I am amazed by you, yet I pushed you to get there.
You would assume you love me more than I love you, but that will simply never be true, and you may never fully know just how wide my love reaches out for you, and that is okay. I love that you look at me with hope in your eyes, you make sure i’m always watching, and baby I AM. I will always feel defeated by the sadness that weeps over you from time to time. I hate to know that I may ever be a reason behind your cries. I created you and I want nothing but the best for you, the happiest, brightest, loveliest things in life, I want those all set aside just for you.
You’re so angelic and fragile in this crazy world, with so much chaos around us, you are the calm I need. Though I admit, you are the storm in my life at times, there is still nothing that shines more like the sun, than you. You have so much ambition and courage yet to be built, but I am certain to help you with that. I will be by your side until the earth decides I shall not walk it anymore, and even after, I will forever be with you.
I love you. My beautiful child.
(all 3 of you)
Brooklyn Leigh 